I let my full weight fall against Burger King's heavy glass door and pushed against it. By nature a fairly passive person, I knew the door would absorb my unusually forceful shove with no loss of dignity. I even imagined it welcomed me a little. Better doors than people. (or...doors are better than people?)
We were en route to the bedside of a very sick relative and I knew we may not make it in time to say good bye.
Over the course of the morning, I had morphed into a tiny black rain cloud, prone to outbursts like thunder claps and sudden showers that washed away any semblance of "strength".
Once inside the ladies room, I wiped away what streaked mascara could be budged and sighed a prayer of "please".
I wasn't praying for extra time. I wasn't praying to get there. I was praying for peace and that all would be well with my uncle...soul wise...you know..."It is well...it is well...with my soul." And I was praying for my aunt who will most notice the drought of his showered affections.
Back inside the car, I learned that my uncle had taken his leave. Just that quick. How closely my praying and his passing coincided, I'll likely never know, but there was a certain proximity that is hard for a person like me to ignore.
A person like me how exactly? I'm not sure there are words for that but... I keep the fortunes from my cookies sometimes if that helps.
The cloud expanded, showers persisted.
I'd lost my Keillor comrade, my Alaskan liaison. 89 is a long life, but not long enough for me to have gotten to hear all the stories I wanted to hear, have the conversations I wished to have. At Christmas, I'd known he knew we may be seeing each other for the last time- I'm the girl that rarely gets back home. He brought me his Clancy collection and some other books. We talked about kindles and nooks and the smell of old books. I told him I'd send him a copy of my friend's new book, a link to an NPR app. We hugged, said 'I love you' - not the worst farewell. But none of them are ever good.
I was a sad little rain cloud.
From the back seat came an urgent cry " I needago potty!" Rye's 4. She waits til the last possible minute. Preschool bladders have no regard for sombre moments.
We stopped at the Nickel Pumper in Estill. She was wiggling she had waited so long. We got to the restroom but found an out-of-order sign on the door.
"No other bathroom?" I asked the hunched over lady at the register. She grunted out something with a negatory sound and I saw that she wouldn't have the location of the employee restroom tortured out of her by the sight of a desperate little girl. She was indifferent to our plight.
I scooped up my urgent urchin and made a bee line for... I wasn't really sure...but we had to get there fast wherever we were headed.
Directly across from the filling station was an auto parts store. There were several men out front so I figured it was open. For the same reason -the all male cast out front- after I'd covered nearly half the distance, I heard my late grandfather's admonition "Might be dangerous for a lady." Actually, he was shaking his head... but I knew exactly what he meant.
I scanned the surrounding businesses, a Chinese restaurant to the left - no clear sign that they were open. Nothing else nearby held the promise of plumbing, no where else had a glowing neon OPEN sign like the auto parts store. Besides, we were at the front door now. No turning back.
"Excuse me, sir" I approached the counter. He had already begun putting his conversation on pause when he saw me approaching. His customer was from Beaufort and it was clear that this shop owner knew his customers, is counted amongst their trusted friends. "Do you have a restroom this wee one might use? We stopped across the street but it is out of order."
"You are welcome here ma'am. They've been playing that same game over there for twenty years."
He excused himself from the customer and led us through the long shelves of auto parts inventory to the facilities we were so desperately in need of by this point.
I've got to tell you...this bathroom was not only welcoming, it was downright cozy. Clean and well stocked, it smelled nice and was stylishly decorated. Not at all what one might expect to find in a place where motor oil is sold and men come in wearing it on their clothes.
This surprise mingled with our gratitude at being granted admission had the effect of turning an ordinary, tasteful restroom in to a haven of rest.
The antique sewing machine that served as a shelf also contained an "Our Daily Bread" booklet...Ah! Perhaps we are family...that would explain the undeniable feeling of welcome. I admit, I picked it up, let it fall open, looking for a glimpse of encouragement, a little silver to guild my edges.
As Riley washed her hands, I thought about what I could possibly buy in this parts store. It is my standard road trip protocol to patronize whatever establishment we have made a pit-stop at. I always feel terribly guilty if I don't. I decided I would at least ask the gentleman's name and try to cast an eye about for something I recognized, to purchase.
I introduced myself, he was Gary he said. I gave a brief overview of the travel situation that had led to us coming in to his store. I told him that his kindness, especially in the face of this bleak day, had been like a soothing balm. I thanked him and told him that if I knew what to buy, I certainly would purchase something.
He objected at that. Absolutely not necessary.
"Anytime you're thru this way, you are welcome here." He realized that we may pass through again on our return trip (Estill is sort of a junction between country roads and cotton fields) He reiterated his warm welcome and sent me on my way with a business card.
As I crossed the road back to the Nickel Pumper, this quote ran through my mind:
"So shines a good deed in a weary world."
~ Willy Wonka.
I felt hugged at a time when I really needed a hug...not that I would ever admit to needing anything...ever.
When I looked that quote up, I learned a slightly different version actually first appears in The Merchant of Venice...Willy Shakespeare.
So, now, I have to read MoV in the near future...just as soon as I can find a companion reader's guide to help me translate. Or perhaps I should see it on stage. (Uncle Roy loved the arts)
Until then, I'd like to channel my best Paul Harvey voice to tell you that when you shop at your friendly C & N Auto Parts in Estill, SC you are shopping with good folks. With old fashioned customer service, fair pricing, quality work and staff who treat you like family, C & N Auto Parts in Estill,SC is a store that is worth the drive. So, stop by C & N Auto Parts for any and all of your automotive needs, and tell Gary I say hello. He's good people.
